This week has been a lot of a hell for me. Of course, as a student, there are the school works and plates that I have to worry about because the deadline is already next week. Even though my professor isn’t really teaching us how things shall be done. Ehem.
It finally came, people. The problem that I’ve been praying for. Not the problem I thought but the problem that would surely test my will and patience. It really happened, nigguhs. It really did.
But instead of blaming Him, I am surprised by my own reaction. I was really calm when I heard it. I am not shock about the news but, yeah, I’m not numb to not feel anything. I was hurt. And I am still hurting.
I tried acting as normal as I could at school. But I failed miserably. I really appreciate my friends who asked me if I was okay. And when I kind of told them(because I did it with actions only) that I didn’t want to talk about it, they gave me the space I needed.
It was our Physical Education class and I was not really in the mood to play Table Tennis with anyone. But while sitting, I thought that why am I acting like that? Why am I acting so weak? Am I this weak? That’s why I stood up and played.
It was hard at first, I couldn’t seem to laugh as true as I could. But my friends started to gathering at the table I was playing at. They all cheered me up and made me laugh. I smiled. And I knew that it was a true one. I really appreciate their efforts to make me happy. I really love these gals!
And when all our classes ended, we went to Depot, a school supply shop inside our University. I was standing at the entrance, waiting for my friend to buy what she needed for our design subject, when a little girl held my P.E. shorts and started pushing me.
I thought she was trying to throw me out of the shop, she’s the daughter of the owner. I was confuse at first but I walked outside as she pushed me a little. When I was about to walk out, she shouted, “No! No! Stand here.”
I was like, “Naku, mapapasubo ang sa English nito, a?” I can speak in English but I really don’t know how I should respond to the kid. I can’t shout at her for throwing me out and then calling me back again.
That’s when I realized that she wanted to play with me. She said that I should catch her handkerchief at a count of three. I did what I was told. And I felt something warm inside my chest while playing with the kid. She was laughing everytime I couldn’t catch the handkerchief. And I can’t stop laughing, too!
My friend told me that the Lord just wanted me to laugh. He sent the little girl to make me feel better, to make me feel like there are so many things to be happy about. And it worked, I actually felt relieved when I was walking home, thinking of what happened at my whole day.
And once again, God moved in me. This time, I felt His presence under my bones that it sent me shivers all over. It’s just so touching that I want to cry. This time, not because of sorrow but because of joy.